I Had Given Up On Love when Sabrina....
A little over a year ago, I met the love of my life when I wasn’t even searching. I had had my heart broken a couple times and I thought it was beyond repair. I was satisfied in life with remaining single for its entirety. One weekend, I was asked to come up to Youth Haven as a working interview for a summer camp counselor. Spoiler alert… I didn’t get the job because of what I am about to tell you.
I went for the weekend and it literally changed my life forever. There was a counselor there that I couldn’t take my eyes off. I noticed the way she got so much joy from being around the kids and engaging in silly activities. She was confident and could be herself. We talked a little, but not much, about both going to school at GCU.
On the last night, we had a competition in front of the kids. We each had to paint a picture of a dinosaur with our noses. I obviously won, but since the kids were biased and had known her longer, they voted for her catastrophic mess that she called a dinosaur.
When I got home, I discovered that she had sent me a friend request on the Book of Faces. I immediately accepted and I wasted no time in sending her a message. We got to talking and I asked her for coffee because I wanted to know her better. Soon, we became good friends. Then I went to one of her acapella shows and heard her sing…. Game over…. My once reluctant heart was ready to take a chance once more.
I was still hesitant and told her that I wanted to move slowly. One night, one of my friends was struggling with life and I took her to the hospital to get some help. As I waited in the ER I was messaging Sabrina the entire time. To my surprise, she dropped was she was doing to come join me. She was there to support me and somebody she had never really had a relationship with. Then after all the chaos, we drove to the top of the parking garage at GCU and did some worship. This was the first time that we worshipped together. At that moment, I knew I had to make her mine.
I got home that night after dropping her off from GCU and we continued to talk. I finally got up the courage to ask her to be in a relationship with me, literally a minute shy of midnight on March 2nd.
Now, I know I’m not easy to love. I had a lot of baggage. I am a recovering addict and just been in the mental hospital 6 months prior. I was still learning how to process and manage my emotions while being a full-time student and working at Grand Canyon University. She was patient with me. She learned how to love me, even when she couldn’t understand what I was experiencing. I found somebody who loved me just for being me.
This was always something I wanted. I wanted somebody to love me for who I am. Somebody who didn’t try to change me or fix me. I acknowledged that I was broken, but I also thought I was unlovable. Sabrina showed me that was false. We took walks when I was having anxiety attacks. She stayed on video chat as I cried in depression without having a cause. She demonstrated to me what it was like to be unconditionally loved.
Through the year we were together, we had to have a long distance relationship because God called her to serve in Missouri. Through that year, we learned how to communicate even when it was hard. We learned how to prioritize each other despite being states apart and working jobs. We learned how to love each other unconditionally. Now, our relationship had lows, but I wouldn’t change a single thing of it in a heart beat because we got to experience each other.
On Memorial Day in 2019, I did something that I had given up on. I took a chance with love and asked the love of my life to be with me for the rest of our lives. I was not nervous about asking her, but I was excited. I was excited to finally give her some gesture to let her know that I am serious. I was excited to ask to serve and support her as her husband in the sanctity of marriage. On May 15, 2020, I am blessed to marry Sabrina and do this crazy thing called life with her.